Tuesday, June 28, 2005
Man claims dead body is the third he's found
Man robbed after friendly chat
I hate it when that happens!
Man to mine gold on Maleny supermarket site
"A man has been given permission to mine for gold on a controversial supermarket site at Maleny in Queensland's Sunshine Coast hinterland. Locals have been protesting against the development, saying it will endanger a nearby platypus habitat."
Man is killing the wild
Holy crap, Man must be stopped!
Man With Bong Attacks Police Dispatcher
Was Man holding the bong when he attacked? Or was it just kind of with him? Again, credit to Mr. Mike for this one.
Man Swallows Key, Locksmith Uses X-Ray
Is this some kind of analogy? I don't get it. Credit goes to Mr. Mike.
Monday, June 27, 2005
Man Gets New 12-Foot Weenie
Man probed for wearing unearned Medal of Honor
Man probed: "Hey, cut it out!"
Man dies after egg attacks on home
A 56-year-old father of five collapsed and died after teenage yobs repeatedly pelted his house with eggs, it emerged today.
Man teeters on bridge; road closed
Man hurt by sword in mock battle
Sunday, June 26, 2005
Man accused of kindergarten arson
All these years and they just now caught up with Man?
Half-ton man loses 573 lbs in year: 'I look a little more like a human being'
Friday, June 24, 2005
Man dies after lightning strikes metal cross
Again, what are the freaking chances. And it happened at a funeral, no less!
Man dies after being hit in head by shot put at track meet
What are the freakin chances of that happening?? Poor Man. And thanks Mr. Mike for passing it along!
Thursday, June 23, 2005
Police: Man Fills Out Job Application, Robs Restaurant
Man killed by lightning at funeral
That has to be a double-whammy.
Hillary Clinton attacked by man from Mars
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
Police seek man
Man wakes up with a bullet in his tongue
Man who slept with body found guilty
Appeared in the Chicago Sun-Times on June 22, 2005.
Tuesday, June 21, 2005
Man puts out fiancee's one good eye
Man: what a jerk!
Man kicked out of bar, returns with gun and shoots
Shoots... of bamboo? Did they mean chutes? Ha ha.
Man dies after punch sends him into traffic
'Smelly' man kills woman
Police Kill Man With Dud Grenade at Court
But if it was a dud grenade, how did it kill him?
This headline comes courtesy of Mr. Mike. Thanks Mr. Mike!
Monday, June 20, 2005
Man punished for doing business in prison
What did they want him to do? Hold it?
Sunday, June 19, 2005
Man 'left for dead' after yob attack
Apparently, a "yob" is a gang of youths "spoiling for trouble."
Man Accused of Growing Pot at Grandma's
Thursday, June 16, 2005
Man impales eye on car antenna after bike crash
Man kills sex-crazed wife
A German court has sent a man to a psychiatric institution after he cut off his penis and killed his sex-crazed wife. The man allegedly cut off his own penis because of the incessant sexual demands of his wife.
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
Man turns himself in for stealing dead man's wallet
Man hiding from police dies in attic when temperature soars
"Honey, you can come down now, the police are gone and it's safe to come down...Honey?"
Man hit in head by train released from hospital
How does one get hit in the head by a train, exactly?
Man strips naked to interview a woman!
This one is extra special because it has an exclamation point!
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
Man threatens to burn down waffle house
Man begins to recover from chimpanzee attack
Man missing penis strolls Jerusalem
Man in boxer shorts creates disturbance
Monday, June 13, 2005
Man, 90, fights off burglar
Is this Man somehow related to the old Man running the marathon? I had to include it for that reason. Will there be a third headline about a super-old Man?
Man punched twice because he didn't 'mind his own business'
Naked man plucked from Rock River by police
Man, 94, in marathon
Go Man, go!
Friday, June 10, 2005
Man crashes car into house, eats taco
Man's 13-foot python slithers off, makes TV debut
Man sought in gropings, streakings at N.H. beach
Man jailed over burglary on run
Kind of like a drive-through burglary?
Police: Man used mirror to look up girl's skirt
Man: What a perv!
Man admits filching city asphalt
Man just needed some damn asphalt, is that so wrong?
I just love it when the word "filch" is used in a headline. Almost as much as I love Man headlines.
Man serving two life terms will remain in prison
Two life sentences ... gee you think?
Man Shot In Head While Eating At Checkers Restaurant
Courtesy of Mr. Mike Crain.
"Can't Man just get a burger without getting hurt?" he writes.
What is this world coming to?
Thursday, June 09, 2005
Man Gets Probation for Harassing Woman With Spam
"Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam..."
Man recalls botched abduction by Japanese
"Remember the time the Japanese tried to abduct me? Boy, they really botched it. That was great..."
Wednesday, June 08, 2005
Woman in court: "Man was Lewd"
This isn't as fun as the original Story of Man discussions. Headlines were decidedly humorous additions to the Story of Man collection by community vote. If we liked them, they were glued to the wall. On it's own, this isn't that funny, but it becomes funny when you picture H. standing up and talking in his high fake British accent, saying, "Ee was lewd!" So,I am submitting this.
Man delivers 4 pizzas after getting shot
Man out on bond allegedly runs over friend while DUI
Man's leg, torso fall out of plane in NY
Tuesday, June 07, 2005
Police wrap: Intruder douses man in petrol
Man With Chain Saw Allowed to Enter U.S.
I had to put this guy's picture in here. Creepy
Naked dancing man arrested
Area man acquires giant truck
Man accused of beating girlfriend with bible to be tried for attempted murder
WWJD? Any "bible thumper" jokes? Anyone? Anyone?
Thursday, June 02, 2005
Man mugged twice more before police arrive
Sounds like it was a rough night out for Man.
Man injured by exploding bomb hurt himself
Man only has himself to blame.
Man Injured in Toilet Blast Files Suit
Question: what was the source of the gas that exploded the toilet?
"(John) Jenkins, a North West Fuels Development Inc. methane power plant operator, entered a portable toilet, sat down and tried to light a cigarette."
Man allegedly tapes his family in bathroom
"A state corrections officer faces charges that he secretly videotaped members of his family as they used the bathroom."
What is wrong with Man?
Police: Man stealing gas uses lighter to check on progress
Glen Germain Junior of Warrensburg, New York was transferring the fuel from a truck to a gas can when he used a lighter to see how full the container had become. That sparked a fire that caused minor burns to his face and hands. The fire spread to a nearby forklift, which was destroyed in the blaze.
From WSTM TV in New York